What to Do About Having a Female Stalker?

You’ve seen her in movies. A lady puts on her big sunglasses, wraps a headscarf, maybe there is a wig change involved—and off she goes to stalk her male lover from the bushes or from a cafe across the street. Some movies treat the topic of women stalkers with more gravity, but the general stereotype is still somewhat comical. 

In reality, the situation with female stalkers is not a joke. Based on the data from the National Center for Victims of Crime, more than one million women and some 370,000 men are stalked in the United States every year. While men do most of the stalking, a woman stalker is not uncommon. Approximately 13% of all stalking cases have female perpetrators, as reported by the National Institute of Justice

What Does It Mean to Have a Woman Stalker?

Stalking is described as repetitive and unwanted behavior that harasses you or makes you feel unsafe. The lines between proper stalking and actions that cannot be labeled as such are somewhat blurry. Perhaps the best description of what stalking is comes from a Quora user who says that stalking is a type of behavior that causes discomfort to its victim. 

In most cases, stalking includes, but is not limited to:

  1. Following, spying on, or watching the victim at home
  2. Harassing phone calls, letters, and unwanted gifts
  3. Threatening the victim or their loved ones
  4. Damaging the target’s property or committing physical assault
  5. Committing sexual harassment

Women most often stalk male acquaintances, but they are rarely motivated by a desire for sexual attack. The Mullen’s stalker typology identifies four categories of stalkers:

Rejected Stalkers

  • The predominant type of stalkers
  • Usually start stalking after the end of a relationship (including friendships and familial relations)

Intimacy Seeking Stalkers

  • Stalk based on a desire of intimacy
  • Often have delusions that the victim loves them or that the stalking will result in a relationship

Incompetent Stalkers

  • Lack social skills but have hopes of intimacy
  • Feel entitled to a relationship even though they are aware of unreciprocated feelings

Resentful Stalkers

  • Most likely to threaten their victims
  • Choose victims randomly or based on grievances

Female Stalkers on the Internet

With new technologies, it is easier than ever to stalk someone. Both male and female stalkers thrive on social media since it is effortless to find the target, hide their identity behind fake profiles, and send unsolicited messages and threats on various chatting platforms. This form of stalking is categorized as cyberstalking, and nearly every state has laws regarding this kind of harassment. 

Psychology of Female Stalkers

Even though there is no clear pattern when it comes to stalker profiles in general, multiple studies point to some common characteristics of women stalkers. They are usually:

  • Caucasian
  • Single
  • Heterosexual
  • In their mid-30s
  • Educated
  • Employed
  • Without children

An interesting finding of a study from 2001, published in the American Journal of Psychiatry, is that female stalkers with an overwhelming majority choose someone they already know as the victim. 

Around 40% of women from the study latched their attention on professional contacts, with a special focus on their therapists. Women are also more likely to suffer from erotomania, a delusion that someone is in love with them despite clear evidence to the contrary. 

A Female Stalking Another Female

According to the same study, while cases of women stalking men are more common, female stalkers are also more likely to stalk victims of their gender in comparison to their male counterparts. This finding doesn’t necessarily have to include homosexual desires. The most common examples of a female stalking another female include:

  • Stalking based on jealousy—motivated by the threat of loss of someone; for example, a girlfriend stalking her boyfriend’s female coworker
  • Stalking based on envy—driven by the desire to get something another person has; for example, a girl stalking your girlfriend because she wants to end up with you, like in this Reddit example

How Can DoNotPay Help if You Have a Female Stalker?

DoNotPay’s mission is to make your life easier by stopping stalkers in just a few easy steps. Experiencing stalking firsthand can be downright traumatic and make you fear for your safety. It is exhausting and time-consuming to navigate the legal system and research options you have against female stalkers. With the help of our robot lawyer, you can protect yourself in a matter of minutes. Check out how easy it is:

  1. Create an account on DoNotPay’s website in your web browser or iPhone app
  2. When you log in, hit Relationship Protection
  3. Choose Safety and Stalking when you start a conversation with our chatbot
  4. Explain the issue by answering DoNotPay chatbot’s questions
  5. Feel free to add anything that might be relevant for your case

Depending on the options you picked during your conversation with our virtual legal assistant, DoNotPay will prepare the best course of action, appropriate for your specific situation. In case you have issues with an in-person female stalker, we will prepare a cease and desist letter which you can send to your harasser. The letter will demand from the stalker to immediately cease all unwanted actions and warn her about legal action that may follow. 

If your female stalker bothers you online, DoNotPay will communicate with the representatives of social media platforms where you’re experiencing unsolicited attention and report the perpetrator. We will also request that they block your stalker and prevent them from contacting you again. 

What Else to Do When Dealing With Female Stalkers?

Stalking can affect the victims in various and severe ways. The consequences can range from negative effects on your mental health to financial costs of seeking therapy or, in the worst case, relocating. Living in constant fear when someone is harassing you can affect your physical health, including poor sleep patterns, fluctuations in weight, sexual dysfunction, and other issues. 

Here are some other things you can do if you’re dealing with a female stalker:

  1. Keep evidence such as videos, photos, letters, and screenshots of online harassment
  2. Consider changing your phone number
  3. Protect your home by installing alarms and locks
  4. Always have your phone with you in case you need to call for help
  5. Talk to others about your situation—if more people know, the perpetrator will have a hard time reaching you directly
  6. Think about getting a restraining order

DoNotPay Can Do Much More Than Just Protect You From Female Stalkers!

Having a stalker is a serious problem, and DoNotPay is glad to provide help with fixing it once and for all, but it is not the only thing we can do for you. Most people struggle daily with an avalanche of administrative and legal issues that they do not know how to solve. Sometimes they don’t even think it’s possible to do anything about these troubles, so they let them slide, while their wallets suffer the consequences. 

You don’t have to sacrifice your time, money, and energy to overcome bureaucratic obstacles. Let DoNotPay fix them for you. All you need to do is sit on your sofa, open DoNotPay in your web browser or download the iPhone app, and get instant help with dozens of issues that mess with your daily zen. Some of the things DoNotPay can do for you are: